The internet is full of those helpful list blogs, ‘5 ways to improve your knitting’ or ’10 ways to save time while brushing your teeth’. You know what I mean. By now you’ve most likely realized we enjoy being a little off beat here at GettingNauti.com so here’s our answer to all those lists;
15 ways to annoy your fellow divers!
1) Be late. Nothing is going to kick start your downward spiral of goodwill like making everyone wait for you. Take it to the next level by having to run back to your car or hotel room for something that you have forgotten too.
2) Spread your gear out all over the place! Space is usually quite tight on a diving boat and taking up as much space as possible and leaving bits hither and thither will not only upset your fellow divers but it’s a sure to ire the crew too. For extra points, leave your fins in the walkway for someone to trip over or leave your weight belt where someone can stub their toe on it, or better still, on the bench where it can fall off with the roll of the waves.
3) Stir it up. There’s nothing quite like descending into beautiful clear water; it makes the dive sparkle so dropping like a rock onto the sandy bottom and then kicking furiously will stir up more than the sand.
4) Race around like a loon. Not only will this enrage your buddy who might just give up trying to keep track of you, but you will also use your air quicker and be sure to be the one who needs to end everyone’s dive. Take it a step further and cause chaos by charging through the middle of another group of divers and scattering them.
5) Make loads of noise – everywhere. Divers love the peace of the underwater world, so underwater rattlers, horns, and bangers when used to excess have most divers gritting their teeth. Talk through briefings and make sure everyone can hear everything you have to say continuously and you might just be left at sea.
6) Get touchy feely. No one likes the diver who chases and harasses marine life; they secretly hope that the next time they stroke or pick something up, that they get bitten or stung, and while they may not say anything, everyone is waiting for karma to come and bite them in the butt!
Seriously, don't be this guy. This guy is a ****ing douchebag
7) Be a tosser. Throwing aaannnyyything over the side of the boat is frowned upon…..
WTF? STOP LITTERING!
8) Blow dry. It’s important to dry your dust cap, but doing it by cracking your tank to blast off the water using the high-pressure air blown from its value set’s some people's teeth on edge – much like fingernails down a blackboard.
9) Smell you later. Pee in your wetsuit and don’t flush it before getting back on board.
10) Tipped. Don’t tip your guide.
11) Brag or moan. Brag about how great your last dive trip was, what you saw, your photos that were better than the pro’s, or moan about how bad your dive just was, how there was nothing to see or that it’s better at wherever you’ve been diving before or that your tank wasn’t full enough. Any of these behaviours will have your fellow divers wishing they’d left you on the shore.
12) Rinsed. Perform either of these rinse tank faux pas, and you will ensure disgusted looks for the rest of the trip. Either rinse your dive gear in the camera only bucket; make sure it’s the aforementioned wetsuit for full effect, or spit in your mask and rinse it back into the fresh water – nice!
13) Photobomb. Making sure you get in the way of photos is a great one, whether on the boat or underwater. Making sure you stir up the viz near a popular subject will earn you special hatred.
Bunny Ears. That's original :P
14) All the gear, no idea. Arriving ready to dive with some new piece of gear that of course isn’t ready to dive and with no manual and no idea how to work it. If this happens to be a new dive computer with multiple alarms factory set to annoy everyone on every dive – even better.
15) Photo pro. Bring a million bits of camera gear and talk incessantly about their technical specification. Claim every inch of available space for fiddling with your gear and make sure you change lens, ports, batteries and strobes in between every single dive. Obviously, you need to hog each subject you see underwater and make everyone wait for you while you take just one more shot.
Know any more ways to annoy your fellow divers? Let us know in the comments below (and be sure to check out all our awesome SCUBA related shirts and accessories!)!